I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel like I live in the shadow of my husband. Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband very much, but there are times when I would love to go out and be the one doing school, working, and reaching for success.
I guess that’s always been one of my weaknesses – success. The lure to be successful at something, to feel like I’ve actually accomplished something. I guess to have proof that I have accomplished something, living proof, like a piece of paper in my hands saying “I did this.” would be nice. Being a mom doesn’t always come with proof or a piece of paper saying you did well, or you did not do so well. It all will reveal itself in time, but even then once my children grow up, their life will be a reflection of the choices they make, and will not completely reflect the time and effort I have put forth to being their mother.
I see men everyday building their successes on the back of their woman. This is not something that is wrong, however to a woman this can become disheartening at times. I can’t imagine the wife whose husband went to school to become a doctor doesn’t feel as if her sacrifice was more than his, and yet she doesn’t get a piece of paper rewarding her for her sacrifice.
I know I felt this when my husband went to school. He didn’t become a doctor, but through the many days he spent at school, work, and studying, I began to feel as though my sacrifices would never be acknowledged.
Could it be that the measure of a woman’s success is by whatever her husband accomplishes in life? Behind a good man is a good woman for sure. I know that any man who is married and has been successful at anything certainly has a wife at home supporting him, making sacrifices for his success.
That’s what the Proverbs 31 wife is:
Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. Proverbs 31:23
I’ve seen what a man can become without a wife, and I have seen what a man can become with a good wife.
I guess it’s OK to live in his shadow at times. My husband does acknowledge my sacrifices so that helps. But there are times when I just see so many woman making so many sacrifices and it just speaks to my heart.
I respect them, and I pray that their reward in this life is a husband who respects them and loves them. I pray that their children grow up and are blessed, because the sacrifices they make aren’t easy. They will never get a piece of paper acknowledging their success in this life, but hopefully the loyalty and admiration of their husband will be enough of a reward.
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